Crushed Seraphim Read online

  Emma began hover-walking in the direction of his house. “How the hell can I show a half-breed something he doesn’t already know?” She directed her question to no one in particular.

  Jason stopped in his tracks. She continued a few more paces until she registered his resistance. Sighing, Emma came back to where he stood.

  “It would really help if you could minimize the diva moments here.” She tapped her angel foot, and Jason put the bunny slipper back on it.

  She looked at the bouncing ears and almost smiled.

  Do I get any input here?

  “You’re not supposed to. I’m supposed to show you your past, present, and future. Then you suck it up and enjoy your freaking life.” She pulled her hair out of its ponytail.

  It tumbled over her shoulders. Jason wanted to curl his fist around it.

  There’s nothing you can show me, angel. I’m going to Croton to find an eagle. Jason stepped in the direction of the town. You can either come with me or wait here for me to have some sort of massive personal revelation that’ll launch you home for your battle.

  She let him get a good distance away before she followed, but she caught up quickly, gliding by his side.

  “So are you just planning to stalk birds and look for one in danger?” She glanced at him, batting her eyelashes. When she heard the alarms go off in his head, she blew a kiss his way, playing with him.

  Why don’t you tell me a little about what we’re looking for? I’m not sure I even understand what’s happened to Sam. Jason gave her a sidelong glance, proving two could play the flirting game.

  “Sam’s my love. My best friend. Everett killed him a long time ago.”

  Jason wanted to think comforting thoughts, but he could only come up with rage.

  Everett? From the clouds? With the wings? He’s a murderer?

  Emma clenched her teeth as she nodded. “He was a murderer before he was an angel. Begging for forgiveness is a powerful tool. God cleans many slates, including Everett’s.” Emma’s mittened fists were tight balls. “When Sam died, he was given the option, as we all are, of reincarnation or Heaven. He chose to return to Earth in another form.” Emma’s voice was flat, like she was reciting a script she knew by heart.

  Will he know you now? Like this?

  Pain stabbed through her eyes, and she blinked to tune him out of her agony. “No. He’s an eagle. He retains none of his human vestiges.”

  And you’re saving him because…?

  She turned to face him fully, stopping their trek.

  “Because he still is. As long as I know what he is, I will do my damndest to protect him.” She looked at the sky again, calculating, dreading.

  “I’m sorry. I should’ve been more sensitive. Please accept my apology.” Jason held a hand out in peace.

  She nodded and resumed their march to Croton. She’d ignored his hand, but accepted his apology.

  Why isn’t God rebuking Everett for his obviously evil behavior? Jason had so many questions for this ethereal girl.

  “God’s in Hell.” Emma finally reached for Jason’s hand, and soon he hovered next to her. They were moving faster than a car on the highway, but exerting no effort at all.

  “Are we starting the Apocalypse? Did I miss something?” Jason squeezed her hand.

  Emma scanned the tops of the trees, looking for someone who’d become something. Their path ended at a huge, high cliff. The view of the sea was extraordinary.

  She was distracted as she answered. “No, don’t be silly. God goes to Hell to parlay for souls every great once in a while. He faces down the Devil for any being he feels has a scrap of goodness.” Suddenly Emma whipped her head to the left.

  Jason followed her gaze to a slowly circling eagle. It seemed to be hovering, using the strong wind off the cliffs to remain like a miracle in the sky.

  “That’s him.” She was quiet, reverent.

  She sighed with relief and Jason gave her hand a comforting squeeze. They watched together as the eagle that had been Sam dove for the water. He returned victorious with a fish clasped in his talons.

  “Do you see that, Jason? He doesn’t have guilt. He just has instinct.” She squeezed his hand back, realizing this could be a teachable moment after all.

  I should have more willpower. Last longer between feedings.

  She turned from the eagle to look in Jason’s golden eyes. “Do you take more than you need? Do you hunt recklessly?”

  He shook his head. He wouldn’t dream of doing such things now. But in the beginning, the learning had been vicious.

  But my impulses — they’re far from pure or respectable.

  Emma searched for the eagle again, and upon finding it she smiled. She let go of Jason’s hand.

  “That just makes you alive, Jason Parish, not bad,” she said. “Impulses are only sins when you act on them, even though you know they’re wrong.”

  Emma went as close as she could to the edge of the cliff, her new vantage point giving her a clear view of the bright yellow construction vehicles below. Jason joined her, mesmerized at the merciless slaughter of the trees.

  “That’s his home. His mate is there.” She pointed to a clump of tall trees that were obviously next. Emma touched her hand to her mouth, stricken with grief over the eagles’ future.

  They mate for life, don’t they?

  “Yeah, he was a monogamous kind of guy.” She watched the bird again perform his aerial show.

  The eagle was obviously disturbed by the noises below. He couldn’t figure out how to get to his nest. Jason had a thought, and he knew he was on to something as soon as Emma looked hopeful. He reached for his phone and dialed Dean. The investments Jason’s mother had hidden around the world for them might finally do some good. The wealth had offered him little emotional comfort until now.

  “Hey, I was wondering if you could do a little research for me.” Jason gave his brother the exact location of the proposed condos. After a few minutes, he smiled. “Can you go ahead and buy them for me? Tell them all construction is to be ceased immediately… Thanks… No, I’m doing great.”

  They waited for a crystal silence, an end to the distant rumbling and banging. Jason tried his best not to stare and to stop thinking about what an angel might look like naked, but it didn’t matter. Emma’s eyes tracked her eagle love’s anxious looping path through the sky, and her mind focused solely there.

  Ninety minutes later, when the machines ground to a halt, the eagle circled once, twice, and was finally able to land. Emma turned to Jason and hugged him so quickly he was almost thrown off balance.

  “Oh, thank you! Thank you! I can’t believe you did that. It means the world to me.” Emma bit her lip and wrinkled her nose, making Jason want to buy for her every condo ever built.

  “I don’t need them all,” she said, smiling. “Half-breed, you are truly kind.” She looked at his lips, and he could tell she was thinking about kissing him in thanks.

  She looked over her shoulder, watching as her eagle returned to the sea to hunt. “I think he’s getting food for the little ones. They have two of the cutest eaglets.”

  Emma turned to watch the free, flying Sam, safe now.

  Jason couldn’t help but feel smug. Take that, Everett. Maybe money can buy some eagle love.

  Suddenly it seemed easy to change fate. He felt powerful and light. Jason wrapped his arms around his personal angel’s waist. She allowed it and hugged his arms in her joy.

  Then Jason heard a sound that tightened his arms into a restraint instead of an embrace. He put all his concentration into holding her, for he could tell she heard the same sounds as she tensed and flapped her wing. A hunter had stumbled into the clearing below.

  The sheer cliff walls amplified the gunshot that rang out. When Sam was shot, his wings folded quickly. He fell like a rock. He fell like a broken dream into the choppy water.

  Jason let Emma fall to her knees and claw the ground, sobbing Sam’s name.

  And he cursed Everett. H
e cursed Everett to Hell.

  Emma heard screaming, but she had no idea the noise was coming from her mouth. The half-breed patted her and quickly ran by, launching himself off the cliff. Emma crawled to the edge, shocked at Jason’s apparent suicide. But when she found him again he was already making effortless strokes toward Sam’s eagle body.

  Of course. He’s not human.

  She wished she could fly out and hover to help pluck her lover from the sea. Jason disappeared under the water and soon emerged bare-chested. He held his shirt as a makeshift shroud around Sam’s body.

  Emma knew she would be grateful for Jason’s altruistic act, but she was dying inside, cursing and hating. Her feathers fell off in a deluge behind her. Only compassion would stop the flow, and she had none available.

  The half-breed was fast, and soon he stood before her, cradling the lump in his arms. He was thinking, and Emma knew she should try to pay attention.

  Finally, when he received no response from her, he spoke. “Emma, I’m so sorry.”

  She sat on the ground. She barely noticed the thick, white blanket that now protected her from the cold. He was imagining things for her still. Like the elements could affect me.

  “What can I do?” He turned his attention back to the sopping wet bundle in his arms, tucking his shirt around the dead animal so she wouldn’t see the carnage.

  She put her knuckles to her lips. Seeing Sam cut down in front of her had brought back so much of her human pain. Just as Everett intended. He set me up. He used Sam to throw me off the path back to Heaven.

  “Half-breed, my Sam is no longer in that body. The reverence with which you handle his corpse speaks to your good heart.” Emma stood and decided to offer the being in front of her some of the kindness he’d shown.

  With a flick of her wrist she forced the snow to form an eagle-sized sarcophagus. Jason stepped to the opening and placed the bundle inside. Emma summoned the strength, the courage, it took to defy Everett’s intentions that she crumble, and she walked to the body. She removed Jason’s shirt and felt her mind convulse with shock and pain. When she handed the shirt back to him, it was dry and clean. Emma took one feather from the bird’s breast and tucked it in her hair. Her talisman. She would use the pain it held as the key to lock Everett in Hell.

  She closed the snowy confines over the bird and stepped back. The same fiery snow that had transported her and Jason through time now took the remnants of a once glorious eagle somewhere else entirely. Jason bowed his head as if in prayer. Emma didn’t bother to sneak into his mind to see if he actually was.

  “Will he go on to the next life?” Jason watched as the smoke from the snow fire glittered and rose.

  “I don’t know. The time between lives is changeable. Right now Everett is in a place of great power. If Sam comes up for Judgment…” She couldn’t put the horror she felt into words.

  “He’s doing your job? Is that what he said? What did you do, Emma?” She turned to face him, his golden eyes so earnest in their desire for an answer.

  She felt numb; she had nothing left after working to contain her anger. She could feel her faith dripping from her wound. She didn’t want him to notice, to worry again. Emma nodded so he’d start walking. As she began to move, part of her heart tore away to stay with Sam in the last place his soul had felt joy.

  They walked a distance before Emma answered. She was looking for something, looking for someone.

  “I was a seraph. We’re in the circle closest to God. It’s a huge honor and a great responsibility. I have failed Him in my weakness. But maybe I can change that.”

  Finally, she heard what she was listening for: the mind of the hunter. That evil bastard who could take a father out of the sky and deny his eagle mate her forever with Sam — she would kill that man now. End him. Send the hunter to his Judgment.

  Jason watched the hunter as well. His mind wanted to heal her, help her. She would use that to her advantage now.

  “Jason.”

  His mind perked up because his name was on her lips.

  “Can you run back to your house for a moment? I think your brother is having a problem. I’ll meet you outside soon.”

  No, he’s fine. What are you up to?

  “Nothing. I just need a minute alone with that hunter.” Emma touched the feather in her hair, and her plan made perfect sense: If she murdered this man, she’d go to Hell. If she went to Hell, she could tell God what was going on. And she could save Sam’s soul from Everett’s delusional wrath.

  Jason’s thoughts revealed his hurt. He’d figured out her intentions. “You can’t. I won’t let you,” he said. “I’ll take him down myself.” Jason was on the hunt immediately.

  “Half-breed, stop. You feed on humans, but you don’t kill them like the others do. I know this. If you murder him, I won’t be able to redeem you or myself.”

  He stopped and turned to face her. You’re in so much pain. You’re willing to go to Hell to make things right. Will God take you back to Heaven if you murder this man?

  “That’s nothing you need to worry about right now. Just don’t be here for it. I don’t want you to see what I can become.” She hovered closer to the hunter. She could hear the man’s thoughts now:

  I can’t believe I did that. I would never hurt an eagle. My God. Maybe I had a seizure?

  Emma lost her nerve. Everett had touched this man’s free will. He’d made the hunter do something he normally wouldn’t.

  “Everett’s going to tear this joint up. God help me. Seriously.” She turned her back on her almost-victim.

  Jason followed at a respectful distance, letting her burn off her pain and anger. She heard him thinking of her dripping wound and praying for its healing.

  She sighed deeply. Finally, in a clearing in the woods with the sun high in the sky, she tried again. She wasn’t a quitter — never had been.

  “Maybe I need to try something more immediate,” she pondered. “I need something in the present I can take you to that will make you see the beauty of your soul.”

  Emma looked down at the fresh snow, seemingly littered with diamonds in its quiet. Only Jason’s footprints led to the spot where they now stood. She listened to his mind. At the word “beauty” he’d pictured her in his arms. She arched an eyebrow, coming up with a quick fix. A sure-fire way to bliss? Sex.

  “Kiss me, half-breed. Make me want to wrap my legs around your waist.” She gave him a sensual stare.

  Instead of melting him, her words gave him confidence. He closed the distance between them and pulled her to him with one strong arm. Jason kept his eyes on her lips as he let his unfiltered fantasies dance from his imagination to hers. She gasped at his creativity.

  He trailed up her arm with his fingertips, stopping at the hollow of her throat. “Are you doing this because you want me? We just buried Sam.”

  Sam’s name was a knife. Pain.

  And then it was exactly what she wanted. She wanted this half-breed vampire to pound the torment out of her. She wanted him to bite her neck and feel every part of her body. Pleasure to combat agony. Kisses to heal the bleeding.

  Emma hovered a bit higher so she could take his bottom lip in her teeth. His mental moan exactly matched the one he breathed into her mouth. She grabbed a fistful of his hair, tugging on it, demanding everything from him.

  Say my name, angel.

  “Jason…please.”

  Chapter 3

  Her lips tasted like vanilla and something — he laughed a little when he realized it was angel food cake. He hadn’t thirsted for anything other than blood and knowledge for so long that wild passion kicked him in the teeth.

  She wrapped him in her arms, massaging, insisting he join her in her frenzied arousal. His body was more than willing to cooperate. But his mind could still hear her crying for her lost love. Her wails echoed in his conscience. He opened his eyes.

  Maybe he could have taken her, slid the soft velvet away from her legs and felt her thighs with his hands, but the
n he saw the tear she was ignoring.

  It shone with touches of metal, leaving a dusting of gold leaf on her cheek. He stopped kissing her and pulled her arms away from him.

  She opened her eyes, angered. “Stop stopping! Kiss me again. Don’t you pity me!” She stomped her foot, and the snow below her propelled into a little cloud.

  He couldn’t stop the kindness coming from his mind, but he knew she was misconstruing it.

  I don’t pity you, but an angel who’s used to endless time might need a moment to breathe after…that.

  He saw the eagle falling into the ocean again, before he could remind himself not to remember. Emma looked over Jason’s shoulder, avoiding his crisp recall as best she could.

  Meanwhile, Jason got busy putting her in something a little less tempting. He visualized her in a pair of flannel pajamas, complete with covered footies and zipped all the way to the top. He added whimsical bunnies, making sure each had a sweet face and pointy ears. Maybe she’ll smile at the bunnies.

  But she didn’t even register the outfit change. Her gaze over his shoulder solidified from pain to hate. Revulsion and anger rolled off of her in waves. It was the same way she’d looked at Everett in Heaven.

  Everett?

  Jason spun and sure enough the angel, resplendent in a white tuxedo and fire red wings, was advancing on them. Jason had to shake off the blurring, uncomfortable feeling of being in the dark, being weaker. Everett headed for Emma with a single white rose.

  Is he really here? Can he hear my thoughts like you?

  “Yes and no.” She stepped next to Jason.

  She wanted to move in front of him, to put herself between the delightful-looking evil and her ticket to Heaven, but Jason held out a hand, warding her off.

  “Well, jackass, sorry to see you here. What’d you do to Seraph Gabriel?” Emma was full of moxie, but as Jason looked at her, she and her new footie pajamas rapidly became transparent.

  The sight of Everett on Earth was causing her to lose faith — again. A quick glance behind her revealed a pool of mercury, expanding by the second.

  Everett smiled like an excited groom. “Emma, sweetheart. Don’t lose all hope. Surely you can still stop me, right? Right?”